twice in a row

I love Japan and I got a chance to visit that country without I had to do something. It was Dad who took care of everything and I, yeah, I visited that country effortlessly.

Then Telkom and UPI weren't two of my uni option when I was in high school but since mom didn't approve my wish to take psychology as my major and I still had to go to college, I got those two. Effortlessly.

Those two above are example how I always got something that I want, but not not desperately, effortlessly. I still had something to work to get those but it was just something that, that I did and done. It was just like you run straight to the finish line without any obstacles.

But when I really want something that I really really really want, I never get it. Even if already did my best, worked hard on it, I couldn't get it. I don't know why though.

Is it because I didn't work hard enough?
Is it because it didn't mean for me?
Is it God's way to tell me that He has something bigger for me?

I don't know ...

I got kill twice in a row this week. The announcement of Telkom's recruitment was out yesterday and I didn't pass. And today, as if to complete my death, KGSP (Korean Government Scholarship Program) also announces the result of their scholarship program and you can guess what happen to me.

Crying a little bit yesterday and a little bit  harder today. Yeah. Who won't disappointed?

yeah....

But well, let's keep "Menikmati dan mensyukuri. Alhamdulillah"

/self-hugging/





Ah, yes. Hello btw c: