Rainy Sunday

This song has been my favorite since I watched Heaven's Postman. Nongolnya juga selalu pas di scene favorite gw. Awal denger uda tau klo ini pasti lagu galau, tapi setelah liat lyric transnya, which is baru tadi sore, yaampun galau. noprob sih ya, gw suka musiknya. adem.

I smile and I smile but I'm not happy
Because you are not here
Outside the window, my face is not sad
Because it is raining
If we shared an umbrella, you would let yourself get wet
Even if something bad happened, you smiled at me

* I didn't say I love you enough
Because I was afraid love would disappear if said too much
I said let's break up way too often
Because if I'm this used to you, even if it's really over
It didn't seem like a big deal

I call you and I call you but you are not here
My heart is coming to a rest
I was afraid that you would find me
When it was windy, you put me behind you
And when something good happened, you looked for me

* Repeat

Because I'm such a fool, how hard was it for you?
I received an overflowing amount of love
(And I always hesistantly worried)
It's good that you left me

My love for you hasn't decreased
I kept it in so much that there is still a lot remaining
I practiced breaking up but
The separation you spoke of was the first time for me
And it was strange- so I shed tears
credit
download disini

btw, gw masih nunggu SM berbaik hati ngeluarin lagu 'Love' yang juga ost dari film ini. mau yang versi solo Jaejoong boleh, versi yang berlima apalgi. huaah banget. ada cdnya gw beli deh.

page 29 of 366

gw kehilangan keberanian untuk ngajak orang jalan
lol

LJ walking

lagi 'jalan-jalan'. biarkan gw meninggalkan jejak

"To let go isn't to forget, not think about, or ignore. It doesn't have any feelings of anger, jealousy, or regret. Letting go isn't winning or losing. It's not about pride. It's not about obsessing or dwelling on the past. It isn't about loss and it's not defeat. To let go is to cherish memories, but to overcome them and move on. Letting go is accepting. Letting go is having the courage to accept change. Letting go is growing up." taken from here

page 16 of 366

sometimes, you didn't forgive people.
you just love them enough to let it go

vice versa

gw sendiri sebenarnya juga jarang ngomong dan berhubungan ama Randy, orang yang gw claim sebagai teman paling lama, sahabat yang ngerti gw.
trus kenapa gw harus sebegitu sedihnya ketika gape ga mau lagi ngomong dan berhubungan ama gw?

.
.
.

mungkin karena biasanya gw lah yang nyuekin orang, bukan sebaliknya.

page 9 of 366

am I a good daughter who always follow what my dad told me to
or
am I too lazy to catch my own dream?

page 8 of 366

'how can I love when I'm afraid to fall'
christina perri - a thousand year

Kornelius R. Tarigan

just because today is Kornel's birthday, I want to write about him.

his name is Kornelius Rasninta Tarigan. yes, we have a same family name but we aren't family in blood related mean. He's younger than me, 1 year to be exactly.

i knew him since our first year in Junior High, SMP Negeri1 Binjai. I was in 1-7 while he was in 1-5. That is why we weren't close before. but we became 'neighbour' in the next year, me in 2-6 and he was in 2-7.

he has smiling eyes, that will spark everytime he smiles or talks. he wasn't tall, same height as me. or maybe shorter.

the first time we spoke to each other, he said " ah, you are Tarigan too? then we are the same. I'm a Tarigan too" with that smiling eyes of him. "what's your name btw"
"I..."
"Sitkar", one of my friend cutting me.
"Sitkar? wah, that's ehm... not an average name. weird, but yeah. sitkar"
and he'll said 'sitkar' 'sitkar' everytime we met. I was annoyed because he'll called me and when I asked 'what?' he'll say nothing. only smiled with his smiling eyes.

p.s: i'm so jealous with his smiling eyes that's why i bought it time for time.

i've met his mom once. it as when we received our graduated sertificate from our junior high. and his mom told me to call her 'mom' too because I'm a Tarigan and my mom is a Sembiring, just like her. that made me and Kornel as family. he became my little brother.

the sparks in his eyes dissapeared for a whole year when he entered dorm. yeah, dorm in first year sure knew how to kill you. and he didn't that 'centil' as before. he even called me siti, not sitkar anymore :(

when finally I entered dorm in the last of our 2nd year, he welcomed me. "you came, finally", he said that. and I was happy.

he is clever. i forgot to mentioned that. once, he became 'juara umum' in our junior high. in our last year if i'm not mistaken. and he got 'unggulan B' in high school. thought I knew, he can get 'unggulan A'. but no problem.

it's so fun to study with him. he can teached you patiently without you felt 'digurui'. and when you didn't understand the subject, he'll repeated for you until you understand. some people called him 'guru', teacher. including julio. he is study in STAN now.

the last time I met was in Puncak, Bogor. that was when batch XII held our reunion. I shocked to met him. I missed him, tbh. and like I always do when I meet someone I miss, I held his hand while jumping-jumping in excitement. he was just laughing.

and now, here is my greet.
dear you my tarigan brother, happy birthday. i hope everything do well in your life. you and your family get blessed. i wish nothing but the best. forgive me if i forgot to taking care of you in our first year in high school. long last with Melli. I'm waiting for the invitation card :p we'll graduate this year, right? success. i love you in friendly way :)

lagu favorite

lagu yang beberapa hari ini suka di repeat di palylist. kebanyakan korea sih, hehe. yah, siapa tahu ada yang minat.

infinite - fixed star

snsd - diamond

akb48 - heavy rotation (versi indo-nya, jkt48, dipake buat ost iklan pocari sweat)

adele - someone like you (lagu sejuta umat)

ost heaven's postman - rainy day (lupa penyanyinya) >> susah nyari link individunya.

kebanyakan lagu ballad sih, lagi seneng.

happy listening :)

random

sedang mood untuk nulis. hehe. ehm, mau nulis random ajalah ya..

gw lagi di Waddaddah, cafe kecil di sebelah Gegerkalong Asri Hotel. tempatnya pewe. aa'nya baiiiiiikkkk banget. teh susu ama kopi susunya enak. kentang gorengnya juga. tapi roti bakarnya bukan tipe mulut gw, rasanya aneh. dan yang jelas, wifinya muanteeeep banget! 10 menit lagi semua donlotan COO gw yang berjumlah hampir 2 GB beres dan gw cukup duduk 3 jam /senyum manis.

ehm, gw tadi abis dari dakol. ngerjain skripsi. bab 2 beres. bab 3 tinggal setengah. mudahan ntar malam ada niat ngerjain trus bab 3 bisa beres, trus besoknya lagi bisa bimbingan. mudahan lagi bisa langsung dikumpul. amiiiinnn...

senin depan uda uas tapi gw belum belajar. hehe. mungkin karena uda semester akhir jadi uda berasa biasa ama ujian. dan yaaahhhh, begitulah.

apalagi yaaa???

gebetan aing tambah cakep euy! hahaha. beneran deh. I don't remember he growing up that handsomely. I want to tell Gape, but yo know abt it :|

masih suka inget rava. inget doang tapi.

masih suka ngayal ga jelas.

ah, belakangan ini cuma makan sehari sekali. tiba2 pengin punya berat badan 45kg. bisa ga ya? bisalah ya...

/berusaha menghabiskan roti yang tidak sesuai selera gw ini >.<

udah ah....

_naput

let me talk about _naput, one of my bestie on twitter.

1. I called her 'emak'.
want me to tell you why? okay here's the story. first, idk but I called papa. so when you see me tweet smth abt papa, it's not my real father but yunho. second, I called every yunho bias in my tlist with mama, mommy, eomma, or smth lke that. third, _naput is yunho bias. so, you know it. but as much as I have another 'mother' she's the only one that close to me.

2. she's cute.
I mean it! even I haven't meet her, just look at her avatar you know.

3. the way she tweets
I totally love it. idk, but the way she said or think or antyhing is cute and funny and , I've said it, I love it. oftenly (?) it's exactly what's on my mind.

4. teenager
she's younger than me. she's 95' lines. too young, rite? but she doesn't think like other teenager. jarang galau dan jarang ngomongin cinta or smth like that. she just talked abt korean, yunho and hoya related.

5. the ways she called me
when she called 'nak' I'll instantly smile. it feels like we really family.

you can follow her on @_naput ^^

page 3 of 366

page 3 of 366
there's no more "dit, kata gape..." or "pe, kata adit..."
they should talk to each other.

me and gape?
ah, we just have that silent-mode-on friendship. it's not permanent, I believe (and I hope).

^^

too early for april mop

I got a text yesterday from Julio. it said " temen2 Julio, ini orang tua Julio. Julio sudah pergi meninggalkan kita semua. saya mita maaf sebesar besarnya kalau dia pernah buat salah, atau salah bicara. tadi malam jam 22.30 pagi dia pergi....."

T___________________________________________________________________T

I just woke up when I received that message. I was crying instantly. I meant, it's Julio, my opa and my (if only I can say best) friend. I was crying like no end.

In my head, every memories about him played like a movie.
... when we made welly's birthday present, round a round school and dorm just to got the best leave.
... when he played the piano and guitar for that present, but instantly it was for me when I said I want someone played for me.
... when he almost held me and swang me around when I told him that I'll go to Japan.
... when he held my hand when we went to cinema, just because we late and the light has turned off.
... when he bought me JCo. exactly everytime we went to Sun Plaza.
... when he accompany me when I was doing my assignments.
... when he listened my whiny - whiny voices.

and then I remembered that I kind of ignored him lately, felt annoying with his attitude. I felt 'bersalah' (I forgot the word suddenly).

T_______________________________________________________________T

then I replied the text. "ini ga bohong kan?"

and ".... di jemput pilot keliling dunia mau nyari indomie rasa babi panggang. wkwkwkwkwwkwk. ini ceriaku apa ceritamu? hahahahaha. peace.."

I was like, eh o.O

aaaahhhhh, juliooooooooo! T___________T

he was just kidding and I have took it seriously. hah! I hate you! T___T

don't play about dead with me, okay. I cant handle it. Agape only ignored me and it feels like I'm dying. and talk about dead only make me really die..

love your friend

happy changing year.
semoga tahun ini jadi tahun penuh berkah buat kita semua.
amiiiin \o/